An open letter to the lady riding her bike.

Hey lady riding your bike up to RedRock today. I know you probably will never read this, but in the event that you somehow stumble across my blog, I just wanted to take a moment to tell you how cool and impressive you are. I know that I was at the edge of the curb bent over adjusting my shifter, and was sooo impressed with your ability to cut the corners so close, brushing against me at what you percieved to be a high rate of speed. I was kind of caught off guard for a moment, but am still not quite sure if it was your complete disregard for a fellow biker, or that ugly one piece spandex suit that you were wearing, you know the red and blue one that made you look like a bomb pop. I was also very impressed with all your gear, the Garman gps, the footy covers, and winter gloves, (although it was actually a nice day and pretty warm).

After I finished up I had to catch up to you just to see what type of knucklehead you really were. Once I caught up (it wasn't that hard) it was obvious what a bike geek you really were by the price tag still hanging off the back of your bike bag. I almost told you about it but, nahhh, it was almost as funny as watching a person with toilet paper stuck to their foor, or a lady with her panty hose stuffed into her panty hose. I have to admit that I climbed on your back wheel, just so you could pull for a little bit while I sat there wondering what must be going through your head. After I got bored and decided to leave you behind I kind of had a little fun listening at you going through all of your gears trying to find one that might help you catch up. After riding alone for a bit I did let you catch up, and I'll be darned if I didn't stick back on your rear wheel and let you pretend that you were actually pulling. I guess on the way back down hill I finally got bored and decided to let gravity take over and leave your little skinny blue and red, color coordinated outfit, bike, helmet and shoes behind for good.
Tomorrow if I see you out riding, can you do me a favor and please try to knock me over again. It was fun riding with you today, and I can't wait to see what goofy thing you decide to wear, or if you will be on a different bike. I know that you invision yourself as the female Lance Armstrong, but although it appears you have spent lots of money on bikes and gear, you can't by manners or speed.